Africa - Day 132

I'm having a ball with the Aussies in Rwanda!

Internet time is really limited though, because we're so busy. We've done lots of stuff with the Rwandese kids and there's plenty more to come.
The team blog is here

I've managed to upload some pics, they're here

Most memorable moment so far:
Leading "You Are My Strength" (a ballad) at a crusade at the Centre for Champions only to hear electronic drums come out half way through and the song turned reggae, which set the whole place into a dance frenzy...random!

Some Possibilities

I've received an invitation to join Storm Harvest on one of their trips. I don't have the $$$ to go so I'm just putting it out there in case anyone wants to fund it.

Here's some info. You can email me at annette_binks@hotmail.com if you want to help.

Storm Harvest (www.stormharvest.com.au) teams have been travelling in Africa since 2004. God has manadated us to work in 9 African nations with emerging apostles in order to resource their churches in whatever way is most appropriate - so that their churches can become self sustaining and reach out to the community in which the church is found. That sounds really great - but what does it mean?

In Zimbabwe it has meant providing for orphans in a totally collapsed economy ... for years there inflation in the millions of %, and often no food in the shops. The story is on the Storm Harvest Web page. In Zambia it means building community centres which will provide education for children who are not at school, adult literacy classes for unemployed adults, small business training for literate adults and a venue for Bible school to train pastors who - up to now - are ministering without training. In Kenya it meant emergency finanical assistance for accountable churches during the post-election violence; In Ghana it has meant building a school in a slum where the government has not provided basic education; in Nigeria it has meant many tears over corruption and deceit.

Now we are planning our third trip to West Africa. We go to Ghana to build a relationship with an emerging apostle and try to build apostolic vision into two pastors who are stuck in a poverty mentality; we go to Nigeria to work with an emerging Apostle and look at two private education initiatives; we go to Liberia - recently emerged from civil war - with our hearts open to see what God is doing and what we can contribute to help the local churches build the Kingdom of God in a tough place.

What do we get? Quite a number of bills. We pay our own airfares and accomodation; we work 16 hour days with no honorarium - because the people we go to are too poor to provide one; we see poverty and hopelessness at every turn - and speak the riches of Christ and a meaningful life; we talk about the economics of the Kingdom of God to Pastors who want to believe in it, but have been so brutalised by circumstances that they struggle to grasp a different future. We develop vision with the churches that will enable the church to change what they have into what God wants them to have ... we offer what we have and see God do amazing things. Lives change direction ... widows get purpose ... orphans get fed ... the sick are healed ... those who hunger and thirst for God's righteousness get fed .. pastors get vision ... communities get hope.

What does it cost to go?
The trip is 13 nights - accomodation and food allowance is US $50 per day - $650
Air Travel to Lagos and back to wherever home is ... US $800 from Kenya
Air Travel within West Africa between 3 nations US $450

Rwanda - Day 6 (Africa - Day 122)

One last excerpt from "Don't Waste Your Life" by John Piper:

"If the discontent with your present situation is deep, recurrent, and lasting, and if that discontent grows in Bible-saturated soil, God may be calling you to a new work. If, in your discontent, you long to be holy, to walk a life pleasing to the Lord, and to magnify Christ with your one, brief life, then God may indeed be loosening your roots in order to transplant you to a place and ministry where the deep spiritual ambitions of your soul can be satisfied. It is true that God can be known and enjoyed in every legitimate vocation; but when He deploys you from one place to the next, He offers fresh and deeper drinking at the fountain of His fellowship. God seldom calls us to to an easier life, but always calls us to know more of Him and drink more deeply of His Sustaining Grace."

Before I headed to Mozambique I was thinking that Rwanda would probably a time of processing for me, and I think it is.

I don't want to go back to life the way it was before. I'm looking for more... a way of better serving God and people.

Rwanda - Day 4 (Africa - Day 120)

Another excerpt from Don't Waste Your Life by John Piper:
"Sometimes I use the phrase"wartime lifestyle" or "wartime mind-set". . . It tells me that there is a war going on in the world between Christ and Satan, truth and falsehood, belief and unbelief. It tells me that there are weapons to be funded and used, but that these weapons are not swords or guns or bombs but the Gospel and prayer and self-sacrificing love (2 Cor 10:3-5). And it tells me that the stakes of this conflict are higher than any other in history; they are eternal and infinite. . . I need to hear this message again and again, because I drift into a peacetime mind-set as certainly as rain falls down and flames go up. I am wired by nature to love the same toys that the world loves. I start to fit in. I start to love what others love. I start to call earth "home". Before I know it, I'm calling luxuries "needs" and using my money just the way unbelievers do. I begin to forget the war. I don't think much about people perishing. Missions and unreached peoples drop out of my mind. I stop dreaming about the triumphs of grace. I sink into a secular mindset that looks first to what man can achieve, not to what God can do. It is a terrible sickness. And I thank God for those who have forced me again and again into a wartime mind-set." [Emphasis added]

It's amazing how easily, even here in Africa, I can slip back into a peacetime mind-set. How quickly my mind will turn back to the temporal. I'm desperate to get better at finding my greatest joy in the Glory of God rather than in fun "stuff". God help me.

Rwanda - Day 2 (Africa - Day 118)

I've been helping proof read case files for AEE. It's great getting to read each family's little story and have a giggle at the redundancies in the locals' writing. I'm really looking forward to getting out into the villages some.

From first impressions Kigali is a much more beautified city than anywhere I've been yet. Perhaps that is due to all the westerners coming here.

I've been enjoying walking down the streets to get random things, talking to kids and getting a better look around.

The nights have been warm which has meant a few restless nights, but I'm getting used to it.

The biggest difference I've noticed so far between the Rwandese and the Mozambicans/South Africans is that they're very touchy feely. Everyone give you hugs and holds your hand for ages and the kids in the street touch you as you walk past. You wouldn't want to have issues concerning personal space.

I've just finished reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan. Good book.

Now I'm reading Don't Waste Your Life by John Piper. It's been the most challenging book I've read so far. Here's a bit of what he says: "I want to be free from self and full of joy in God; I want to enjoy making much of God, not me. And I want the fullness of my joy to last forever."

I'm excited!

I'm flying to Rwanda tomorrow!

It will be really interesting to see the differences and similarities it has with Southern Africa.

Tonight I'm playing at a church meeting for drug addicts in Joburg. Should be very interesting.

Back to the Cold

I'm back in South Africa for a few days. Flying to Rwanda on Tuesday. I'm getting quite excited!

Mozambique was really wonderful. I spent most of my time organising Trish's office, cooking and hanging out with the teenage girls at the orphanage.

Most of the challenge came on a spiritual level. I really had to trust God to protect me from the dangers of Mozambique. In some ways it's a lot safer than South Africa, but the threat of malaria and various other parisites and knowing there are bandits in the surrounding area (and me with a completely open window) certainly had me packing myself a few times. The spiritual atmosphere in some places was very dark. The night of the full moon was by far the worst. Lester had given me a letter and told me to remember Psalm 121. Perfect scripture for my time in Mozambique.

Overall the experience was very rewarding. I had an absolute ball spending time with the kids and getting to know them.

There are some new pictures up here.

Bring on Rwanda!

Some Pic's

I have managed to upload some pic's. They are here and here.

Maforga

Well the drive through Zim certainly was interesting! We took longer getting supplies in SA than we expected and were running a bit behind schedule. Roy and Trish (who run Maforga Mission) know a bunch of people in Zim so we spent a fair bit of our day visiting their friends. We stopped and had coffee with one of the few white farmers left in Zim. His name was Keith Campbell. He was a very interesting man, hardened by the land. He knows Kevin Rudd...haha. KRudd was at his place a few years ago to write a report on the situation there.

Driving in Zim at night is quite dangerous so after a quick stop to visit one of the members of the opposition party (MP's there are just as poor as everyone else, she had no electricity so we stood there talking in front of the car's headlights) we decided to see if we could stay with one of Roy and Trish's friends for the night. Those friends just happened to be in SA at the time and thier driver offered for us to stay with him. The closest motel was another hour away and even then we weren't sure if it would still be in business (as so many businesses have had to close down). So we decided to stay with the driver, before we'd been in his house. So there was five of us saying in a one bedroom house. The walls were full of dead antelope of various types (taxidermied) and kids toys (probably from the guy's childhood) along with grade 9 merit certificates. after a quick look around I started to get a little concerned. This guy was either going to be really nice or a serial killer. It was a very interesting experience to say the least, but after a lot of prayer I dealt with my apprehension and slept. I wasn't dead in the morning so that was great.

We arrived safely in Mozambique on Thursday. It's quite beautiful.

There have been some good rains and the crops have done well so the famine is over. You wouldn't even know now that less than six months ago there were people camping out at Maforga for food, and people in villages starving to death.

Trish is writing a book about her experiences in Moz and it's being released next month, so for the time being I am acting as her PA. I'll get in with the babies later.

The 450 babies they look after are actually orphans who live with extended family. Maforga provides food and health care for them.

Larry

For those of you who like Larry, there's some new pic's of him up here. His new family is very nice.

I leave for Johannesburg today where I will wait until Tuesday or Thursday and then go to Mozambique. Yay!

Moving On Out

Good news!

I'm finally about to get moving! In 9 days I will be heading to Maforga Mission near Chimoio (half way between Beira and Zim), Mozambique (via Zimbabwe) to work in their orphanage (they have 450 babies). I will be there until the middle of June. I'm expecting that it will be quite overwhelming (if you have a read on their site you'll understand why), but I'm really excited to be getting out into the "real Africa" and seeing where and how God is going to use me, and what I will learn.

From there I will return to South Africa and catch a plane to Rwanda to meet up with my cousins, Mel and Sheryn, as well as the RiverView team that will be there two weeks after we arrive. We're hoping to go to Uganda for part of our stay, which is a month all up.

From there I have no idea where I'm going, but those details will all be worked out at the right time.

The time of rest that I have had has been very much needed I think and I've been learning a lot about trusting - really trusting that God will take care of the details. I'm a planner by nature and having to completely submit my desire to have things all planned out has been very stretching, but I am glad to have experienced it.
Hebrews 11:6 says "...anyone who wants to approach God must believe both that He exists and that He cares enough to respond to those who seek Him" (The Message). Sometimes I struggle to believe that He's not going to just leave me hanging there mid-air...hurtling towards the ground, but that scripture reminded me that He really does care and that as long as I'm seeking Him, He'll sort out the rest.
So while I had a bit of a freak out (again) at thinking I was meant to go to Maforga and then the details not being worked out fast enough, thinking that my SA visa was going to expire and I still had nowhere to go...after a sufficient time of squirming...those details worked out in a day. God took care of it.

A quick shout out to Shannon and Sarah who both sent me messages withing 24 hours of each other, both with verses from Hebrews. They were exactly what I needed to hear.

On Saturday I went out sightseeing with some of the ASM students. It was a whole lot of fun. Completely exhausting but well worth doing. There are pics up here and here.

The community here at ASM has been so welcoming, and although I have missed my Perth friends it's been wonderful to know that I am part of a community here too. I'm going to miss my ASM friends. We've had a lot of fun together. Jacqueline, you're beached as!

Tegan and Mike, congratulations! Hope you're enjoying married life so far. Chris, thanks for mentioning me at the wedding, I feel like I was there now :)

Also, one of my besties, Karlee got married just a few weeks before. So Josh and Karlee, here's your shout out. I need to see more photo's!

While I'm at it I'd also like to thank all the people who are supporting me financially while I'm here. Without you none of this would be happening. And thanks too to everyone who's praying for me, I am certain they're making a big difference.

Banana Farm

I got to go out to the banana farm again, yes, the banana farm. It was great to go back there again, this time with a song in my heart. It's funny how the same place, same kids, same situation brought only joy this time.

There are photo's up here, including some of the girl who inspired the song. Her name is Mpumelelo.

Quickie

The internet has been down at ASM all week so I'm at Postnet trying to organise a trip to Mozambique to work in an orphanage. There will be more details up as things progress.

In the meantime there are new pics up here and here.

I climbed the Legogote Mountain on Friday. It was fantastic!

A Song

I wrote this song a few weeks ago, a month after the encounter.



Over in the corner there's a girl by the window
in a wheelchair she was given last year
Her life before was spent lying all day long
on a concrete floor that's soaked with kerosene
and she's calling me

The other kids are running free
She turns her head to look at me
She's calling out with her big brown eyes
She can't use words, she cannot speak
but with those eyes she's burned right through me
My heart is breaking
My heart is breaking

What can I do to tell you you're beautiful
to tell you that you're not alone?
Little girl
What can I do to tell you you're valuable?
You're precious beyond all measure
Little girl

My mind is racing, It's full of doubt
What if I get it wrong and she freaks out?
I'm so unsure of what to do
but I walk across to stand with her
I take her hand and I gently whisper
I see you
I see you

And she smiles
Oh how she smiles

Back to White River

I'm back from Mozambique after what was a very interesting car ride back. We left at 4:30am and at around 5pm we burst a tyre only to find that the spare was pretty flat and had a bubble in it. We managed to pump it up with a bike pump until we could get to the nearest town to get a new tyre. When we got to the town there wasn't anywhere with the right size tyre so we just had to drive on the spare. So we drove home averaging 60km/hr, for 250km. 22 hours after we left we arrived home.

Apart from the crazy car ride Moz was fantastic! I really enjoyed the weather and getting to see all the tiny little huts and bright red clay roads. The locals are friendly and seem pretty happy, totally different culture to South Africa and there doesn't really seem to be any racial tension. I think I could very happily live in Moz, I'd just have to learn to speak Portugese :)

There are new pictures up here and here

While we were gone one of the guys here found two tiny kittens dumped on the side of the dirt road near ASM. One of the kittens was very close to death so he took them in and looked after them. I still have some cat food left over from the pregnant cat I was feeding (that has since gone missing) so the kittens now have real food (they were getting milk and muesli before). They've been living with me for the past two days and the nearly dead one is heaps better, he's gaining weight (be was just a furry sack of bones) and can now jump and play which he couldn't before. They're very cute and make me laugh a lot, except the big one thinks 6am is play time and starts jumping on my face!

Also, there are monkeys at ASM but I had only seen them once and had been out looking multiple times. Then yesterday I was just sitting in my room with the door open and a monkey walked right past my door! So I went out to look and the whole family was there. I got a few pics.

The monkey and kitten pics are here

Mozambique

Well, after a 19 hour drive (that should have only taken 9) I'm at Tofo Beach, Mozambique until Monday. I managed to lose my wallet on the way which is a bit of a bummer.
I'm here with some friends from ASM who lived here for 3 years, along with an Englishman and an indian. It's a beautiful place, warm and by the ocean. My days so far have consisted of trips to the market and the beach, and there is a coconut chilling at home waiting to be cracked open. AUD$1 = 19.95 Meticals, and almost everything here is 1/3 cheaper than in Oz. The official language is Portugese and the chicken is delicious!

Tonight is the full moon, so we're headed to the Full Moon Party at Dino's Cafe, along with half of Tofo.

There's no "white" church here in Tofo so we're holding a little service on Sunday for the local English speakers.

We stopped by the Limpopo River on the way through. It is indeed green.

Pics are up here

Tumble Dry

Well all the late nights and early mornings finally caught up with me. I had a migraine last night and woke up this morning with a pretty inflamed throat and sinus. So I slept for 14 hours and kept quiet for the day. I'm not 100% yet but I'm heaps better.

I tumble dry my clothes here, because there are Mango Flies that lay eggs in damp clothes and when you put the clothes on the eggs penetrate your skin, hatch and grow larvae. Then you get boil like things until they climb out. Gross!

Job's boils

One of my friends here has a boil at the moment, which got me thinking of Job. I have named my friend's butt "Little Job" and decided to read the part of Job that talks about his boils. A little random I know, but reading a little further I came across something that I've missed every other time I've read Job. Job's children had just died and he was covered in boils from head to toe...

"When three of Job’s friends heard of the tragedy he had suffered, they got together and traveled from their homes to comfort and console him. Their names were Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite. When they saw Job from a distance, they scarcely recognized him. Wailing loudly, they tore their robes and threw dust into the air over their heads to show their grief. Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and nights. No one said a word to Job, for they saw that his suffering was too great for words." - Job 2:11-13

Sometimes sitting with a friend who is in pain is all you can do...and it's enough.

Two Sisters

Yesterday I went out to Two Sisters, a drop-in centre for orphans, near ASM. The internet has been down so I haven't been able to post pics until now. They are here.
The kids sang some songs and had a bible lesson and then Jacqueline, Portia and I went outside to talk with the teenagers. They were all orphans living with foster parents. We had a question and answer time and I found it really interesting that they were asking the same questions that western kids ask. How do I deal with peer pressure? When can I get a boyfriend? Why do I have to go to school? They really are pretty hard questions to answer.
The question I found myself asking was, what can I do to give these kids a sense of purpose? Some of them are working hard and staying on track, but some are looking for comfort in the wrong places and it will most likely end up killing them.

Overall it was a great experience, and I'll go back if I get the chance.

CatRat

I forgot to say, two nights ago I saw a rat on the side of the road (near ASM) that was bigger than Merlin (our cat). No joke. I thought it must have been a mongoose or something, but it was a big ass rat. Talk about scary!

Kruger

Yesterday I had the opportunity to go to Kruger Park. It was great! We saw a whole bunch of animals and didn't get eaten or trampled by anything. I've put a whole bunch of pics up here.

I had a challenging week, in that I haven't been doing much and I still don't know where I'm going or what I'm going to do. So after a bit of a freak out I realised that God has me in a Sabbath Season, a time to rest and just be with Him. I don't know how long it will last, but that's OK. Life was so crazy at home and I was always so busy, it's nice to have a bit of a breather.

Excitement

This Mozambiquan Spitting Cobra was in the prayer room at ASM last night. A group of manly men headed out to kill it, but one of the guys managed to save it before they did. It was only around 30cm long. It certainly added some excitement to the evening!

Back

I'm back at ASM now. The camp was challenging, interesting and very muddy. Heaps of kids met God so it was worth all the effort and lack of sleep.

There are some photo's here

Week 2 Pics

Are up here

Camp!

This is what the mountain has looked like in the mornings for the last few days, after it has rained at night.

It's looking like I'm going to stay at ASM for the rest of the term. Today I'm heading to Sikelele with Edrei, Jacqueline, Maresa and Scharl (from ASM) for a youth camp until Monday...1500 kids and only one leader per 50 kids! They're not christian kids either so this could be interesting, but I'm really excited to see what God is up to and looking forward to imparting into the kids.

Please pray for us.

Rain

It bucketed down last night! All the frogs were out, it was great (if you like frogs). This little frog was sitting at my door. I tried to find out what it is, but limited internet speed meant I couldn't. If anyone knows please let me know :)

I'm doing a course this week called Kairos which has been interesting.

Braai

Today I went in to White River for some groceries with Kelly (he's a pastor from North Carolina, USA), Amaranda (one of the staff here) and her son and grandson. There is a place where you can get a 5L water bottle refilled with clean water for just 4 Rand, which works out to about AU60 cents. We had lunch at a cafe and then headed back in the afternoon. It was very pleasant.

Tonight I had my first Braai, which is basically just a BBQ... but with boereworst instead of sausages.

There are more photo's here

Some Quiet

I've had a quiet couple of days.
Yesterday I sat out on the balcony by myself all morning looking at the mountain and just enjoying some space. I'm trying not to fill all my time with "stuff", and here at asm is a great place to catch some chill time.

Later in the afternoon I headed out to K2-Masoyi Home Based Care, a project about 10 minutes away that does a whole heap of stuff including advocating for orphans and vulnerable children. Check out some pics here . It was a bit too late in the day to see much but I hope to get out there again soon.

Today I played guitar with the band for chapel. My fingers are pretty sore...I played for a couple of hours yesterday morning, then a couple in the afternoon, then this morning and I have rehearsal for all night prayer/worship in half an hour. My poor fingers are not used to playing acoustic!
Then I went back to bed, feeling a little headachey...I think the jetlag may be hitting a bit.

Tomorrow I'm heading into White River to shop! Yay!

Mobile Clinic

Today I went out with the nurses who run a mobile clinic. We went to a banana plantation and set up there where the creche is for the workers' kids. It was a fairly quiet day today. Sometimes the nurses are there from 8:30am-9pm but today they managed to get through all the patients before 1pm. These nurses basically do the job of a doctor, diagnosing and treating patients with a whole range of diseases.

My first few minutes there were a little overwhelming, it's hard to describe what I was feeling, but I think it was mostly compassion. It was so sad and yet they were so beautiful. I had to work very hard to keep myself together.

I got to hold a two month old baby who was brought in by his grandmother, she looked no older than 30. The baby was severely underweight, he had in fact lost weight since his last visit and it turns out his mother has been in hospital for the last three weeks with malaria. They have no money for formula so this tiny baby has been living off soft porridge and water.
ASM has a feeding program for HIV babies, but due to budget constraints they are unable to provide formula for non-HIV babies. The baby's grandmother wanted him tested for HIV as she suspects his mother is infected.
We gave him a bottle to settle him a bit so he could be properly assessed and then he was tested for HIV. Because it's only been three weeks since he was breastfed he could still have his mother's antibodies, so he may return a false positive if she is infected but he is not. The tests showed he could be infected, so he was put on the feeding program, but will have to be re-tested in a month to confirm whether he's HIV infected or not.

There were around 20 kids in the creche, all under the age of five I'd say. I pulled out my guitar after all the patients were seen to and the kids danced around...shaking their little booties. So cute!

Most of the children are malnourished and underweight, so ASM provides vitamin supplements to give them a better chance. They seem pretty happy though.

I also "got" to use my first drop dunny...talk about stinky! There was no door, the dunny was just in a little building around a corner. My thighs got a good work-out but overall I came out of the experience quite well.

I don't know what I'm up to tomorrow, but I'm looking forward to getting out with the nurses again sometime soon.

P.S. Sarah, you're going to LOVE the mission field!

Week 1 Photo's

I have uploaded some photo's

View them here

Day 4

Now that it's daylight I can actually see what's around me! Mountains! It's a good thing I like them :)

I had the worst night sleep so far last night, I think I only got around 2 hours of real sleep but I'm doing OK.

The ASM guys have been very accommodating and I'm allowed to come and go as I please which is great for me. I like to be free!

The internet here is slower than dial up...or so I'm told, so I'm going to have to wait until I have a few hours free to post pics.
I've decided to write my posts on here, but post photo's on my facebook, so I'll just put a link to them on here once they're up. It may take me a few days.

End of Day 3

I made it safely out of Joburg! Yay! The 5 hour bus ride to White River (where Africa School of Missions is) was AMAZING! The mountains, oh! the mountains! Today I felt like God had created me to love Africa. The beauty of His creation was so breathtaking I had to remind myself to breathe. I tried to take pics but they just don't do any justice. My credit card decided not to work at the Pick n Pay so I hope it's OK... It worked on Saturday... So here I am now at ASM, everyone I've met seems nice. It will be interesting to see what tomorrow has in store.

Johannesburg

28/02/09
Well I made it to Johannesburg! The flight was very non-eventful & seemed about half as long as it should have...and I haven't cried since I left Perth! I woke up this morning to bird calls I've never heard before...it was great! I don't really feel like I'm out of Oz yet except people keep speaking at me in Afrikaans...hehe. And I don't think African bananas are quite as gross as Aussie ones. Thanks to everyone who sent me goodbye messages, sorry I didn't reply. I really do love you!

I'm back

Looks like this blog may receive new life!

I'm leaving for Africa in nine days and I expect to be staying for around 10 months.

So watch this space for updates on my adventures.

Coz I feel like it...

I know it's been a very long time and it's highly likely that no-one will read this, but I feel like writing. So much has happened since my last post and yet it feels as if so little has changed. I'm at uni studying Primary Education, something I felt very strongly I needed to do...at least until opportunity presents itself.

This uni business is something to do with being a good steward of my time, being faithful in the little things, in the mediocre. Everything within me cries out to be doing more, to be loving more, to be giving more. It feels like I have so much to give, but so little opportunity to give it...or maybe it's just so little time. How is it that I can feel like I'm in the right place and the wrong place all at the same time?

I want to spend more time with the homeless, but they seem so hard to find. Perth feels so isolated, not just from the rest of the world but from each other. The fact that there are thousands of homeless in WA and yet I can't seem to find more than a handful. Where are the people sleeping in their cars? Where are the people living with their electricity turned off? Where are the children who won't get a proper meal today? I want so desperately to be able to give them something...and it feels like time and distance are ripping my heart out.

God, how do I do this?

I feel as though my light has dimmed.

Proverbs 13:12 says "Unrelenting disappointment leaves you heartsick, but a sudden good break can turn life around."

It feels like I've been in this place for a very long time, with a sick heart waiting for a good break. Good breaks come, but they are short lived and it seems like they're just there to keep me from giving up. Disappointment is unrelenting. I am tired.

I am finding solace in the Word, but I am ready for something more than what I know now. I hope, though I do not know how there is still hope left in me.

He is still good.

He is still my purpose.

He is still my desire, my delight, my destiny.

Been A While

OK so it has been quite a long time. Life is busy. Deal with it.

It's often said that change is the only constant in life. It's so true. So much has changed this year it seems kind of crazy. Although my immediate circumstances (work and living arrangements) haven't changed much my friendships and leaders etc. have changed a heck of a lot. Change is hard and exciting at the same time. I like it, and yet I often find myself raging against it as I struggle to keep hold of what I once knew.

I wrote a song about it. You can listen to it at www.myspace.com/annettebinks
I's called "Ride This Wave"

I went out photographying with Corina last Tuesday night after rehearsal. It was really fun. I took this shot under the Narrows Bridge with my Ixus on a 15 second shutter speed.

Brooke!

So I went to see Brooke Fraser last night.

ALWAYS a good thing to do

My Hallelujah

Sometimes I wonder
how I ended up here,
Coz I'm still just a boy
in these over-sized shoes

And I've nothing to say
that won't add to the noise
Enough has been said.
And not much to give
but a few simple tunes

And this is my song
this is my hallelujah
and all that I want
ia to sing it for you
And this is my heart
and I'm bringing it to you
I know that it's broken
but it plays hallelu

Hallelujah
Hallelu

I feel this old road
goes much further than I do
But I keep stumbling on
and lean into your grace
'Cause I wanna go home
I wanna lay down beside you
I wanna feel your sweet breath
on the side of my face

This is my song
This is my hallelujah
and all that I want
is to sing it for you
This is my heart
and I'm bringing to to you
I know that it's broken
but it plays hallelu

Hallelujah
Hallelu

-Paul Morrison

SessionSixty: Sonny Edition

Nearly 2 litres of juice got spilled in Sonny last night, as we were cleaning it up I decided to do a sessionsixty

The Rules:

Black and White
24 shots only
400 ISO
60 Minutes
No editing

I accidentally only took 23 shots...and pressed the shutter twice on one shot so there were two exactly the same so I deleted one.